Off and on over the years I've spoken to friends about how shopping is not the way to fill a void in your soul. I logically know this. However, I've gone on a small shopping binge over the past few weeks (see Sunday's post), and it was today that I realized that sock yarn, as lovely as it is, won't fix what I'm feeling about Brownie's long illness and death.
That said, I haven't felt the urge to look at Etsy all day (or any other yarn websites) which is a very good thing since I received this today.
(Insert picture here!)
Woolly Boully Meanie in Luna Moth.
I have another skein of sock yarn and sock bag to carry socks in progress on the way. Brooke of White Willow on Etsy shipped them today.
I've also had a chance to process some of the other feelings I have about Brownie's death. Part of me misses her while part of me feels relief. Of course I feel a bit guilty about feeling relieved. It has been a huge relief to not have to clean up after an incontinent cat several times a day.
Does the sock yarn shopping have anything to do with the fact for several months earlier this year my paycheck went straight to my credit card which had been used at the vet's office? Let's face it, working in a yarn store, while incredibly wonderful, doesn't pay as well as keeping books for small businesses who are willing to pay for outsourcing.
Sorry for the disjointedness of today's entry. I use this blog to examine some of my emotions and give you, family and friends, a chance to not read about them instead of whining to you over coffee or the phone. You have the opportunity to say "Eve's getting a bit emotional, so let's go see what's happening at Stuff on my Cat."
More cogitating on deep matters later.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
I am so glad you sound a bit better.. I know losing Brownie had to be so hard.. I like the story about standing outside with a laundry basket on your head for her to jump in too if she got caught on a roof.. that was cute.. and another example of what you will do for your furry friends... We went out of town this weekend and Cookie and Bazzie stayed at the Vet... We call it CAMP. lol.. anyhow.. we got both the pups home.. and Cookie has been acting strangley not her usual self.. kind of extra quiet and less playful.. I snuggled with her this morning on her bed.. usually she wont let me snuggle there with her for long.. this time she curled in closer.. normally she gets on the bed with us.. and snuggles against my leg then should it start getting colder she makes a bed for herself between my legs which REALLY SUCKS for me because then I am pinned down in the bed.. but hey she is happy and thats all that matters.. as for her behavior right now. Steve just thinks she is a bit shell shocked. as we usually find someone to stay at the house with them or come and let them out... We have not left them over night at the vet since Cookie was a puppy and she is 3 now..
Eve, Just feel good about the love you gave Brownie and know she is okay now.. .. and no there is nothing wrong with feeling a little relief either...
Post a Comment