Fare thee well, Brownie.

Today was the day we've been dreading. I had to work today, and that certainly didn't help matters any at all.

This morning I noticed Brownie's eye looked odd. This is the one that had the original hemorrage. It looked slightly swollen to me. I wasn't sure about it though, and other than that she seemed quite as usual for her current state.

A little later Keith asked me if I thought her eye looked wierd. By now it was noticeably swollen. We decided that he would take her to the Emergency Animal Clinic while I went to work. After all, it was too late for me to get someone to cover for me. I figured he would need some reinforcement since I've been the one who was there for both April and Ripper's final trip to the vet. I got to work and called Daphne, leaving her a message.

In the meantime, Keith couldn't find Grey. He knew she was outside, and we can't go off and leave her locked out. She's a panicky sort of cat, the proverbial fraidy cat. She would shred the front screens and who knows what else in her frantic state. Keith looked for her. By the time he found her, he decided to wait for me to get home.

I had a feeling when I saw her eye as I left for work that there were probably 2 options. One, surgery to remove the eye. Two, it was time for the final trip to the vet.

We took her to the EAC and had a really wonderful vet. She examined Brownie and offered her opinions about what we could do. Dr. Bell was very compassionate to all of us. She agreed that it was probably time to let Brownie go. She mentioned those things that we hadn't really thought of, such as even if we wanted to do the eye surgery on Brownie, would she survive it? Would she be able to heal afterwards?

We had made the decision pretty much before we even took her to the vet. Her health was deteriorating. She very rarely went outside anymore. She barely ever left the kitchen anymore. I was amazed to see her outside one day last week. Having a terminal pet (or relative) leaves you in that low level anxiety all the time. Is today the day it will happen? For us, today was that day.

I leave you with memories I have of Brownie when she was young and a complete terror. I wish I had digital pictures, but they are all film and have to be scanned in. I was always very protective of my kitties, and I don't like to let them run around outside that much. Brownie became insufferable, and for several years she would go out every night during the warmer months. Keith and I (but mostly me since I wake up earlier) had to get used to seeing what dead things awaited us each day. Brownie was an extremely prolific hunter. Some weeks I would receive dead squirrels 6 days in a row. She brought us beheaded bunnies (ugh!). For years we had no chipmunks in our yard or the neighbors because she and Pixel were relentless. Those 2 would not suffer a rodent within their territory. (BTW - Pixel is still quite spry.) Brownie would have made a most excellent barn cat. Anyone with a barn or sheds would have been thrilled to have this pinnacle of feline ferocity. And although we called her things like Browniedamnit and the Brown Menace, we will really miss her.